Dear AT&T

29 Jun

Dear AT&T-

I will be gracing one of your locations this afternoon around 3pm. I suggest you start puckering now.

I have been a faithful customer of yours for four years. That’s only slightly shorter than my relationship to my husband. And by far the longest relationship I’ve had with a cell phone carrier by far.
I love your coverage. Thanks to you, dear AT&T, I have multiple bars of reception in the deepest, darkest corners of Meijer and Walmart. An almost superhuman feat.

I’m more than satisfied with my plan and service, but THIS $*@+ PHONE HAS GOT TO GO!


When I got this phone it was described to me by the salesman as one of the best, fastest and most reliable phones we carry.”

Sir, you were full of shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiz.

The very night said pos (as in pieceS of shiz. B got the same phone.) we spent hours on the phone with customer service trying to figure out some kinks with the phones. It was our first night alone with them so I figured it was just user error.

In the less than 12 months we’ve had these phones we’ve been at dear AT&T for:
-phone freezes
-new sim cards
-phones randomly turning off

All extremely annoying things that have not been fixed.

Now my phone is
-not receiving texts
-or phone calls
-or voicemails until hours if not a day later
not connecting to the internet
     When I have service
     Am connected to 3G
     Am paying for internet
without a functioning alarm clock.
And my personal favorite!

Please tell me what the point of having a phone is if I can’t make or receive calls and texts or access twitter, facebook and this here blog (despite apps for all of the above) AND PAYING A FAIR CHUNK OF CHANGE FOR IT?!?!?!

So I will be in a store yet again complaining and seeking answers. And possibly a brand spanking new phone.

Let the puckering begin.

AT&T, you’ve been warned!


5 Responses to “Dear AT&T”

  1. angelapea June 29, 2011 at 10:25 am #

    I would walk into the store with the phones and a sledge hammer, and then very sweetly inform the customer service rep that ATT will either replace the phones with something functional at the same price point as the pieces of garbage or they can have them back…in pieces. (Take the SIM card out before you get there!) The instant the rep starts stammering, lay the first phone on the floor, hand the sledge hammer to a random person waiting around and tell them to take a whack at it. Keep passing the sledge hammer until the phone is a pile of rubble! If that doesn’t do the trick, lay the second phone on the floor and keep going!

    Yeah, floor and not counter, though the counter would be more dramatic. There’s a potential for splinters in eyes lawsuits at counter level. Better bring goggles, too.

    Good Luck!

    • smallworldbiggirl June 29, 2011 at 10:58 am #

      If only I had B’s phone to take with me.
      I’m too nice when I go in there. I’m all complacent and mild mannered. Now I’m pissed, fired up and feeling pretty damn fiesty!

  2. Pamela Gold June 29, 2011 at 10:31 am #

    Unfortunately AT&T is taking over the world of phones. They just bought out T-Mobile too! I used to love my phone too and had to have it replaced because of the random shutting down bull. Also? I used to get decent internet access at my house, which is kind of in the sticks, but now? It blows….It’s like they did something random to make that happen. Asshats. Good luck! Also? They only seem to care about their “new” customers vs. the ones like us who have been with them for years. Again, asshats.

    • smallworldbiggirl June 29, 2011 at 10:56 am #

      Maybe I should cancel my contract and start a new one…
      I’m about to tell them they replace and upgrade our phones for free or I’m taking my business elsewhere and sticking them with a bill. This is bullshit.

  3. Sarah June 29, 2011 at 4:47 pm #

    Good luck! I had a very nice lady from AT&T hang up on me once. This was after she explained to me numerous times that in order for her to troubleshoot my phone I needed to dial their customer service number from my phone even after I kept explaining to her that I CAN’T MAKE CALLS — THAT IS WHY I AM CALLING YOU FROM A LAND LINE WOMAN! If I could call you from my cell phone, I would.

    Never ever again will I be an AT&T customer no matter how much I covet the iPhone. (I know — Verizon has it too.)

    I’m still bitter about that break up even though I entered into a lovely relationship with Sprint that is going swimmingly. I need to move on.

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