I was kinda hoping the awesome time I’m having playing Mommy would mean something different. Trying not to pee myself while getting the all important Thing I Stick In Pee out of the stupid wrapper would be a lot different if there wasn’t such a let down.
The at home pregnancy test companies NEED to come up with a different way to test. If paternity/DNA can be determined with a Q-tip rubbed around in your cheek, why am I PEEING on something?!? And if I have to pee on something, let’s make it a little more sanitary, please. Or at least make that damn foil thing the test comes in easier to open. When you’ve got to go, you’ve got to go. Farting around with that thing is just sheer torture.
The test does mean something, but not what I was thinking it might.
It means my period is 8+ days late just because.
It means I had some kind of stomach bug and the nausea wasn’t I thought it was.
It means the Red Coats are coming.
Armed with super tampons.
Overnight protection with wings.
And the cramps that make me double over in pain.
It means I was kidding myself.
It means one less month to give B the child of his own he’s always wanted by 30.
It means I’ve failed to do the one thing women were specifically designed to do.
It means I’ve taken a hit.
It means I’ve lost a little more hope.