Hallmark is really messing with my mind.

12 Feb

Monday is Valentine’s Day. Hub and I don’t have plans to do anything. We embrace our inner 80 year-old, we’re usually in bed by 8. Getting up at the butt crack of dawn for work requires an early bed time. 

Hubster and I don’t exchange presents for any birthday/holiday. Hub’s parents never exchange gifts for each other, but buy something they both want together. They don’t even want presents from their kids for holidays. They take tis better to give than to receive very seriously and are generous givers.  My parents would buy one or two things for birthdays and exchange a few presents at Christmas.

 Both of our birthdays are in December. The first year we were dating we set a spending limit for both gift giving holidays. Hubs gave me a gorgeous diamond necklace. ( Hubs says the store was having a going out of business sale, but I still think he went over budget. This was well before joint bank accounts so I have no idea, but I’m certainly not going to complain!)

 The next December we decided to go out for a nice dinner for our birthdays. Totally fine with me. Then he decided to surprise me with an engagement ring between my birthday and  his birthday/Christmas. ( Hub has excellent taste when it comes to giving gifts. You can’t go wrong with diamonds!)

The next December we were married. We had a house with a mortgage and bills, so we decided to go the way of his parents and buy something together for the house. Totally fine with me. Same for last year. I’m more than okay with that.

Hubster has given me flowers once. I didn’t know how to tell him I had fertility issues and our chances of having kids by his self-imposed deadline, or at all, weren’t looking great. I knocked back a few glasses of wine and had a full-fledged panic attack. Between sobs and hyperventilating and word vomited everything the doctor had said. He said he had to go get gas and left. I was irate…Until he came back with flowers. That I dried, pressed and saved. 

 I was so touched by that one little gesture. I wish he would do things like that more often. He set the bar so high for himself. And then stopped playing.

I don’t mean that I want Hub to go and spend tons of money, buy diamonds or flowers all the time or go all out with an extravagant night out. With everything going on in our/my life right now I could use a little something that says I know this is a Hallmark holiday and not really important, but I wanted to do a little something to show you I love you. Not that our marriage is in trouble, or I doubt Hub’s love but I could really use that little something extra. Am I being ridiculous and bending to all the Hallmark hype?

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One Response to “Hallmark is really messing with my mind.”

  1. Amanda February 13, 2011 at 4:47 am #

    I don’t think you’re being ridiculous, but as I’ve learned, men aren’t very good at being mind readers. Maybe suggest something. Hint that you liked what he used to do?
    I don’t know; M’s never been one to affectionately shower me with things; I was ecstatic when he facebook messaged me a long love letter, haha. So I dont have much to go on.
    He sounds like a good guy. I hope you get the little extra you need. *hugs*

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